Thursday, November 4, 2010

Things are a changing

Hi sorry its been a while time gets away on me .Lots of changes about to happen I don't know whether I have talked about my gorgeous wee mum. She has Alzheimer's at 86 she is strong physically but her world mentally is getting smaller and smaller it breaks your heart.Its got to the stage where its become increasingly difficult for Dad to manage and Mum has been assessed as needing a secure Dementia unit as she likes to wander.
We have Mums name down at a local Retirement home its pleasant has a lovely garden the staff are friendly and Pauline who runs it is a kind and compassionate person.I know Mum will be well cared for we can visit whenever we like BUT I cant help feeling guilty,sad and have a great sense of loss grieving for the person Mum used to be.The one conciliation is that to a certain extent she has no idea of how much has changed for her I am a great friend someone she can rely on I am no longer her Daughter in her mind.
Next week my younger Brother is visiting for a couple of weeks he hasn't been to NZ in ten years.I am so looking forward to seeing him and having some family time.It will be interesting to see if she remembers Rob I hope she does.
Change is a perculiar thing something I'm not great with one thing we do have is fantastic memories and pictorial evidensce of what a wonderful loving mum and grandma she is.


Trace said...

Jane, my lovely friend, I so feel for you - such a difficult, difficult decision to make, even though it's for her safety. We had to place a relative into a home for exactly the same reasons (she ended up not liking the first one because there were men there...even though she'd been married for umpteen years and had sons lol...). She loved the next one...even though she had no idea who we were when we visited... "but lovely curtains dear..." It's a funny old world isn't it.

Esther said...

Be strong my friend - Grieve all you need to! Love and Hugs - Esther

Anonymous said...

What a hard decision for you all. Big hug from me and thinking of you.

Brenda said...

So Sad to hear about your Mum.. Thinking of you at this really difficult time!!
Lots of Hugs sent your way xx